Pacifica (autumnwinds) wrote,
Pacifica
autumnwinds
The 4th Crusade: A Play
Starring THE CRUSADERS, THE BYZANTINE EMPIRE and THE MUSLIMS


MUSLIMS: "Arr."
BYZANTINES: "Save us, Western Europe!"
CRUSADERS: "Okay!"

CRUSADERS come to save the capital of the BYZANTINE EMPIRE, Constantinople


CRU: "Whoa! Constantinople is way better than Europe!"

CRUSADERS sack the city


BYZ: "Not helping!"
MUS: "HA ha!"
CRU: "Let's go save Jerusalem now!"

CRUSADERS march towards Jersalem, become distracted.


CRU: "Let's go to Egypt!"

They arrive in time for the ANNUAL FLOODING OF THE NILE, and make camp on the FLOODPLAIN.


MUS: "Um...okay, if you want."

MUSLIMS open the dikes, flood out the army, drown half of them


CRU: "Save us!"
MUS: "Only if you leave us alone."
CRU: "Fine!"

Muslims put what's left of their attackers on ships and send them back to Europe


FIN
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