So, our local Jo-Ann's is moving to a new location (and condensing to a larger, inconvieniently-located superstore, which pisses me off), and they're selling off all their inventory at deathly low prices. Mom and I went there last week to see if they had any interesting garden art to stick in our yard. We got a metal sun post with a clear light green center, I got some pretty nautical-looking hanging lamps for tealights, and Mom and I picked out this neat thing. It's a metal sculpture on a tripod (about 2 feet high), with three hoops at the top that wrap around each other, sorta like electron orbitals, and then a foot-long metal arrow pointed through the middle of it (which pivots). It looks vaguely scientific, like an astronomy instrument or an astrolabe or something. It's neat. We put it in our bulkhead with the new plants.
So last night, I was walking the bulkheads with the garden hose, watering each plant individually, but really soaking them because the heat got to them badly yesterday. Towards the end, I saw my delphiniums in the back were wilting a lot, but for some reason I didn't see the Metal Sculpture With Arrow in the plants and I forgot it was there. So I put a foot up on the bulkhead, lunged forward with the hose, and STABBED MYSELF IN THE THROAT.
Thankfully, I'm not dead. It didn't break the skin. But it hurt like hell. I don't know what my problem is.