Pacifica (autumnwinds) wrote,

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Raining for the past couple of days now, which matches my mood perfectly. I feel so tired and alone. I finally pulled myself out of bed this morning with all the tiredness of having sobbed myself to sleep the night before, and spent hours just walking through town, feeling the water trickle down all over my body. It's a good rain...not a slow, lazy one, or a hard, insistent one. It's dark enough to feel like the world never woke up today, and the shower is enough that it doesn't drench you, but you're very aware of its presence.

It felt good to get out of the house, anyway. There's been a terrible smell for the past couple of days, like some mold exploded or something.

I've been restless for the past week. I've been taking long walks up along the ridgetops, watching the sky and the moon movements, ambling through the suburbs, looking at all the homes with overgrown lawns and gnarled trees. Shuffling from place to place without stopping anywhere.

I'm writing down the lyrics of the song I'm listening to right now. It's called "Anchorage." It's a melancholy, wandering accoustic melody that feels good to hear right now. I thought the title was appropriate, since I have none at this time in my life.



I took time out to write to my old friend
Walked across that burnin' bridge
Mailed my letter off to Dallas, but
Her reply came from Anchorage, Alaska.

She said, "Hey girl, it's about time you wrote
It's been over two years, my old friend.
Take me back to the days of the foreign telegrams
And the all night rock and rollin'
Hey 'Shelle, we was wild then.

"Hey 'Shelle, y'know it's kinda funny
Texas always seemed so big, until you're
Hangin' out over banks
Up in Anchorage.

"Hey girl, I think the last time I saw you,
Was on me and Leroy's wedding day.
Tell me, what was the name of the love song you played?
I forgot how it goes.
I don't recall how it goes.

"Leroy got a better job so we moved.
Kevin lost a tooth, now he's startin' school.
I got a brand-new eight-month old baby girl.
I sound like a housewife.
Hey 'Shelle, I think I'm a housewife.

"Hey 'Shelle, y'know it's kinda funny,
Texas always seemed so big, but,
You know you're in the largest state in the union,
When you're anchored down in Anchorage.

"Hey girl, what's it like to be in New York?
New York City, imagine that.
Tell me, what's it like to be a skateboard punk rocker?
Leroy says send a picture.
Leroy says hello.
Leroy says, oh keep on rockin', girl,
Yeah, keep on rocking.

"Hey girl, it's about time you wrote,
It's been over two years now my old friend.
Take me back to the days of the foreign telegrams,
And the all night rock and rolling.
We was wild then.
Keep on rollin.
Oh, Anchorage,
You live in Anchorage,
Oh, Anchorage.

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